


Gave Me Heaven

by Pippin



Category: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: F/M, Reunion Sex, Reunions, Sort Of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-30
Updated: 2018-03-30
Packaged: 2019-04-15 00:03:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14147526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pippin/pseuds/Pippin
Summary: It was over a year now since Inej had set foot in Ketterdam, and Kaz definitely didn’t miss her...he wanted to kiss her.





	Gave Me Heaven

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first time I've written anything like this, so I hope it's okay.
> 
> Title is from Silence by Mike Posner because honestly the song is so Kaz/Inej.

It was over a year now since Inej had set foot in Ketterdam, and Kaz definitely didn’t miss her.  No, not at all.  He was a busy man, running a gang _and_ working on taking over as the King of the Barrel.  He didn’t have time to miss his Wraith, not beyond the practicalities of wishing she was there to spy for him.

But then there were the very stark reminders that he was no more than a man—a teenage boy, for all the work he put into making sure no one thought of him as such.  These reminders came at night, as he put in work towards eliminating his issues with touch—that was what it was, right?  Kaz Brekker did not fall victim to mere urges of the body when he could prevent it, never mind the hand wrapped firmly around himself that spoke otherwise. 

But he truly had made great strides in touch, beyond just his own body.  He had managed to throw a casual arm around Jesper’s shoulders more than once, had let Wylan position his bare hands on a flute, had barely flinched away when Nina had hugged him enthusiastically when she had visited from Ravka.  It was something, something he hoped would translate over to Inej’s return.

Inej’s return.  Another source of secret anxiety.  He knew how they had parted, with a firm press of bare hands that was as good as a promise, as good as a kiss.  But a year and change had passed, a year in which Kaz hadn’t changed and Inej surely had.  She was a pirate now, hunting down slavers and exacting revenge.  He, conversely, was doing the exact same thing as when she had left, little good in a cold heart with room only for love of money.  And maybe a small part, the part that held Jordie’s memory, had some room for Inej, too.  He didn’t know when she would be back, either.  She had promised return in the few letters she had managed to post, but even she hadn’t known when she would be making it back.

Kaz sat at the desk in his room, going over accounts.  He had taken over the downstairs office, but he still did his best work at his old desk, in his old setting.  It was where he felt most himself.  Of course, Kaz was at home anywhere in the Barrel.  He could make a place for himself out of nothing if he needed to, and he had.  But it was always nice to be properly home.

A small noise at his window had Kaz immediately on his feet, grabbing at the knife he kept on his desk.  Its official purpose was to serve as a letter opener, but it was definitely convenient for situations like this.

“You lock your window now, Kaz,” a soft voice said, and Kaz immediately dropped the knife again and collapsed back into his chair, looking at Inej’s form in the window.  He hadn’t realized just how much he had missed her being there until she was back again and the longing hit him like a blade.

“I didn’t know you were back in Ketterdam,” he said with a frown, half trying to cover and half legitimately concerned.  He should have known.  It was his job to know everything that was happening in the city.

Inej laughed softly.  “We docked less than half an hour ago.  We didn’t have anyone other than my crew on board, so disembarking was quick.  I came straight here—I wanted to come home.”

She dropped lightly onto the floor, pulling the window shut behind her.  She turned to face Kaz, and he felt his heart skip a beat.  Her time at sea had agreed with her—she was, if possible, even more beautiful than when she had left.  A new scar crossed her face, one that almost mirrored the one on his own face.  Kaz wanted to run his thumb along it.  He wanted to kiss it.  He wanted to kiss her.

Inej arched an eyebrow, and Kaz realized he was staring.  “What business?” he asked hoarsely, trying to cover, and he had to be imagining the shift towards disappointment in her body language.

“It’s going well,” she said tersely, turning to face the window.  “We’ve rescued a good few ships of slaves.  Some people we let live.  Others, well.  I learned cruelty from the best.”  Her voice at that was cold.  “Dirtyhands taught me well.”

The only reason Kaz didn’t flinch at that was because of his perfect control.  “Inej,” he said, the word coming out as barely more than a breath.

She turned to glare at him.  “Am I wrong?”

She wasn’t, and she could see that truth in his eyes.  Kaz had taught her everything she could learn about how to be cruel and cold and barely human.

“Is there no humanity in this Dirtyhands you speak of?” he asked, lips quirking up into the barest hint of a smile.

“Sometimes I’m not sure,” Inej admitted.  “I thought there was, but maybe that was just wishful thinking out on the sea.”

That hurt, Kaz wasn’t going to lie to himself.  Before he even thought about it, he was across the room, Inej’s face framed in his bare hands, his touch hovering just above her skin.  He could feel the heat of her skin, and it was more intoxicating than anything else he had ever come across.

Inej tipped her head, scarred cheek pressing against his skin.  His fingers gently caressed her skin, almost without conscious thought.

“I want to kiss you,” he admitted lowly.

“Can you?”

“I don’t know,” Kaz answered honestly.  It wasn’t like he had tested that over the last year.  “But I want to try.”

Inej searched his face for a moment.  Whatever she saw there seemed to satisfy her, and she leaned up on her tiptoes.  Slowly, carefully, she pressed her mouth against Kaz’s own.

The sensation was so novel that there was no water, no panic.  There was just Inej and her soft lips against his.

Kaz dropped his hands to her waist, pulling her a half step closer so that their bodies pressed together.  That was a mistake, apparently, for he was still only a teenage boy whose body operated on a hair trigger, especially given that he hadn’t exactly experienced anything like this with another person before.  With the press of their bodies, there was no way that Inej couldn’t feel his arousal, and it had her flinching away before she could stop herself.

Kaz hated himself in that moment.  He had been so excited to touch her that he had forgotten that she had her own issues as well.  She had been in the Menagerie.  She had had to let any man touch her who paid.

“I’m sorry,” he gasped out, turning away from her.

A gentle hand on his shoulder turned him back to her.  “I want this,” she promised him.  “I want you.  I just need to sort out my head, figure out how to make this work.”

Kaz nodded.  “I understand.  I’ll just…”  He waved awkwardly towards his bedroom.  “Take care of things.”  He could feel the flush on his face.

Inej nodded, returning to her perch on his windowsill.  “I’m going to see Jesper and Wylan.  I’m also going to try and figure out a way to make this work.”  And then she was gone, leaving Kaz to deal with his body on his own.  And if he got off thinking of the press of her body against his and with her name on his lips, well, no one needed to know.

* * *

The next night Inej was again in Kaz’s window.  “Jesper and Wylan are enjoying each other’s company,” she said, wrinkling her nose.  “Not that I begrudge them their happiness, but they don’t remember that I spent time in the Menagerie.  Sometimes seeing things brings me back.”

“And doing things?” Kaz asked.

Inej tipped her head.  “I have an idea, but you’re not going to like it.”

“If it means I get to touch you, anything.”

Inej fixed Kaz with a stony stare.  “I need to have control.”

That made sense.  When she had been in the Menagerie Inej had never been allowed to have any kind of control.  It wasn’t easy for Kaz to hand over the power he had fought so hard to gain, but, like he had said, he would be willing to do anything in order to get to touch Inej.  So Kaz nodded.

Inej slunk over to him, a walk she had to have learned while in the Menagerie, but Kaz refused to think about it.  Slowly she pulled his gloves off one by one, letting him bring his hands to her face.  He traced lightly along her scar, then dropped one hand to undo her hair.  Once her hair was loose he buried his hands in it.  In response, Inej shoved Kaz’s jacket off his shoulders, letting it fall heavily to the floor.  Then she pulled off her top, standing before him in her trousers and undershirt.

After a moment, Inej used Kaz’s tie to pull him in and down for a kiss.  He held still, letting Inej control the kiss.  She nipped lightly at his lip and he opened his mouth for her.

As they kissed, Kaz felt Inej’s hands slip down his chest, loosening his tie and undoing the buttons of his shirt.  He shivered, and she froze, pulling away enough to free her mouth.

“Are you okay?”

Kaz’s voice failed him once before he managed to answer in the affirmative, promising Inej that he was fine.  “Are you?”

Her response was to pull him back in, whispering her assent against his lips.

After a few more moments Inej stepped back, staring at Kaz with hungry eyes.  He felt already completely undone, his shirt open and his tie loose around his neck.  His pants were still done up, but that was hardly an asset, given their current tightness.

“Take your shirt off,” Inej ordered, hands twitching at her side.  The movement was slight, something Kaz only noticed because of how well he knew her.  It was a motion that signified want, something that emboldened Kaz.  He stripped off his shirt, tie, and undershirt, but the control that had made him the man he was wasn’t easily overcome, and he ended up folding them in a neat pile on his desk, taking his jacket from the floor and adding that to the pile.  Inej chuckled softly at him, the sound sending a chill down Kaz’s spine.

When Kaz turned back to Inej he nearly choked.  While his back had been turned she had removed her undershirt and leggings, leaving her top half and her long legs bare.

Saints, he wanted to touch, an urge that he really didn’t know what to do with.  For years he had avoided every kind of skin-on-skin touch and now that sensibility was being completely subverted.  All he could see was smooth bronze skin, nothing like that which he had once clung to.  Her breasts were small and he wanted to cup them, wanted to see what kind of noises she would make under his touch.  But he had promised her control, and he wasn’t about to take that away just because of his want.

Inej reached out slowly, hands hovering mere inches from Kaz’s chest.  “Can I?” she asked quietly.

Instead of responding verbally, Kaz took one of her hands in one of his own, pressing it firmly to the center of his chest.  He shivered violently at the sensation, but having his own hand there as well helped, and after a moment he was able to remove his hand, giving Inej free rein to explore the dips and rises of the muscles of his chest.

Kaz looked away from Inej’s hand on him to her face.  She was gazing raptly at the area she was exploring, eyes dark.  Without looking she grabbed for his hands, placing them on her bare sides, just below where her ribcage ended.

“You can touch.  Anything above my waist.”  Her voice was rough, almost a mimicry of Kaz’s gravel.  He liked the implications that he had this much of an effect on her.  But he also liked the idea that he could touch.  She was so warm, so firm and present and _alive_.  His aversion to touch was barely an issue, almost completely forgotten in favor of exploring Inej’s soft skin.

Inej shuddered softly as he swiped a thumb over one of her nipples, a soft huff of breath escaping her.  She mirrored the action on Kaz’s chest, and he had never thought he’d be particularly sensitive to a touch like that, but it seemed that he was. 

Inej smirked slightly at the sound Kaz had made, doing the same thing on the opposite side, drawing out whatever noises she could.  Kaz buried his face in the curve of her neck, mouthing lazily at her collarbone.

“How is your leg?” Inej asked suddenly, pulling her hand away from his chest, stepping away and out of his reach altogether.

Kaz frowned, confused and already mourning the loss of her warmth and softness.

“How is your leg?” Inej said again, stepping closer and brushing a hand over Kaz’s thigh, dangerously close to where his cock pressed against his zipper.

“It’s…fine,” Kaz said, distracted.  It was no worse than usual, not that he had any idea why that mattered.

Inej smirked at him, stepping backwards towards his bed.  Kaz followed.  “You told me once that you would crawl to me.”

Kaz’s breath hitched and he dropped to his knees, looking up at Inej through his lashes.  She kept retreating from him until her knees hit his bed and she sat, spreading her legs, leaving room for him to fit his body between her knees.

Inej muttered something to herself, the only piece of which Kaz caught was his own name, and gestured for him to come to her.

His face burned, but he crawled to her, willing to do anything at this point.  He’d never been with someone before, too concerned with building his reputation, and now that he was experiencing it lust was taking over.  He would do anything she asked, and she was asking him to crawl, so he would do it.

Kaz slotted his body in between her legs, still on his hands and knees, looking up at her.  From this angle, she looked like how he imagined one of her Saints.

Inej smiled down at him, carding a hand through his hair.  “So good,” she cooed, and her words sent a jolt through Kaz.  No one had praised him in years, not like this, not since Jordie had died.

His reaction must have been visible because Inej repeated her words, voice soft and affectionate.  “You’re so good for me.”  She leaned down to tenderly kiss Kaz’s forehead, and he tipped his face up to her, silently asking for a proper kiss.  Inej obliged, using the hand in his hair to tug him up to meet her.  Then her free hand slipped down between his legs and Kaz gasped sharply at the sensation as she rubbed at him through his pants.

After a moment Inej pulled her hand away and Kaz keened softly at the loss.  “Take your pants off,” she instructed, and Kaz scrambled to comply, removing the remaining fabric and standing bare before her.

Inej pushed Kaz onto the bed on his back, following a moment later and straddling his thighs.  “Hands above your head,” she instructed, wrapping her hands around Kaz’s wrists once he complied.  She then lowered herself to press a kiss against the skin just below his collarbone.

“Still okay?”

Kaz murmured a yes, not entirely trusting his voice at the moment. 

In response, Inej sunk her teeth into his skin and he jerked harshly under her.  “Saints, Inej.”

She grinned at him wickedly, sending a bolt of heat through him.  “Good?”

“ _Yes_.”  It stood to reason he liked a bit of pain, really.  He had grown up and into himself through it, had fought and bled to become Dirtyhands.  Pain was a fact of life, and having it turned on him in a totally different setting was honestly way hotter than he could have ever imagined.

Inej’s smile gained a bit more edge, if that was possible, and she leaned down to bite him again in the meat of his shoulder.  Then she sat up, resting her hands on his upper thighs, barely an inch from his crotch.

Kaz wanted.

After a moment of just holding his gaze, Inej brought one hand to brush lightly against his cock. It was barely a touch at all, just the barest graze of fingertips over heated skin, but it was enough to have Kaz bucking his hips up, chasing her touch.

“Behave,” Inej chided softly, pressing his hips down with the hand she’d just been teasing him with.  She licked her lips as she watched him, watched his cock twitch at her words and actions, then her fingers were back, light brushes that were driving him crazy.

She released his wrists, scooted further down on his legs, then replaced her fingers with her lips.  The touch was still light and barely there, but the warm moist heat was almost too much.  She was barely mouthing at him, teasing more than anything.  It was starting to really drive him insane, and Inej was sure to know that.

After a few more moments of teasing, she sat back, leaning away from him.

“Do you know what one of my favorite parts of what I do is?  Besides freeing the captured, of course.”  Inej’s voice was calm, conversational, and Kaz wanted to swear at her.  He didn’t want to talk about her work on the sea right now—he didn’t want to talk at all.  He wanted her to touch him.  He would take anything as long as it was more than her previous teasing, but really he wanted to be inside her. 

“It’s just a personal thing, something I’ve always enjoyed, to be honest.”  Inej met Kaz’s eyes.  “I like it when men beg.”

Kaz shivered, knowing exactly what it was she meant.  “Please.”  His voice cracked in the middle of the world, not one he was entirely used to saying, at least not in all seriousness, and definitely not in this context.

Inej arched an eyebrow.  “Don’t tell me that’s the best you can do.”

Kaz took a deep, shuddering breath.  “Inej.  Please.”

“Please what?”

Saints all damn, she was going to make him ask for anything he wanted. 

“Touch me.  Please.”

Inej wrapped her hand firmly around him.  “Like this?”  She didn’t move her hand, waiting for him.

“Inej.”  Her name was more a moan than a word, and her eyes glittered with amusement as she answered.

“Yes?”

“Touch me.  Properly.”  He took a deep breath.  “I want to fuck you.  But I also want whatever you’re willing to give me.  But please, stop teasing.”

Inej considered for a long, long moment, then knelt up to pull her underwear down and off, shifting from leg to leg but not releasing her grip on his cock. Once she had dropped the fabric off the side of the bed she knelt up over Kaz, using the hand still on him to line him up before she sunk down slowly.

Kaz was tense, more to keep himself under control than because of the touch, but Inej still paused, powerful muscles in her legs flexing slightly as she checked on him.

“I’m okay,” he promised, hands twitching above his head.  He wanted to run his hands up her legs, over those muscles, and then let his fingers touch at her core.  He wanted her to fall apart at his hands.

Inej didn’t look fully convinced, but she continued her slow slide along his length until she was fully seated on his lap.

“Can I touch?” Kaz asked, voice more hoarse than usual.

Inej gave him an almost skeptical look, one that was offset by the slight rocking of her hips.  “Kaz Brekker, asking to touch?  What has this world come to?”

Kaz glared back at her.  “Inej.”  He didn’t want her to see how much her saying his name while like that affected him, but he was already so undone, so it was a tossup.  The part of him that was Dirtyhands was clinging to whatever control he could retain, but the part of him that was still little more than a boy was willing to hand Inej every piece of him, to let her take him apart until there was nothing left of him.

Inej rolled her eyes.  “Yes, you can touch.”

Now that he was free to move his hands, Kaz almost didn’t know where to put them.  He wanted to touch her legs.  Her breasts.  Her core, where he could see the joining between their bodies, revealed by her small motions.  His hands flitted over her skin, never settling anywhere, not sure where to settle.

Finally, he ended up with one hand on her chest and the other on her thigh, where he could feel the shifting muscles as she rode him.

“More?”  Kaz barely recognized his own voice, as broken as it was.  Inej was still hardly more than teasing, for all that he was inside her.

Inej laughed softly, the sound he had first fallen in love with, and then she was truly riding him, chasing her own pleasure on his body more than anything else.

Inej slipped her hand down her body, rocking between Kaz’s cock and her own hand.  In response, Kaz moved his own hand, the one that had been steadily slipping down from her chest, and placed it over Inej’s hand.

She gave him a heated look, tossed her hair over her shoulder with a shake of her head, and moved her hand to his hip.

The air was hot and heavy, filled with the sound of skin on skin, harsh breathing, and occasional moans.  Kaz watched her atop him, watched her fall steadily apart, and fell apart himself.

When Inej came it was all but silent, a hitch in her breath and then a long exhale.  Kaz watched her shudder for a moment, and then she shifted back to perch on his thighs again.  He whined softly as he slipped out of her, but the noise quickly became a moan as she wrapped her hand around him with quick movements that were just this side of too much.

It was perfect, and it couldn’t last long.

Kaz came hard with a low moan, cock pulsing in Inej’s grip.  She looked at her hand with something like amusement, then brought it to her mouth and slowly licked off what he had gotten on her.  That visual alone had Kaz’s cock twitching.  He couldn’t go again so quickly, but damn if that wasn’t hot as anything.

After a moment Inej got up and walked soundlessly to the small bathroom off Kaz’s office.  She took a moment, then returned with a rag to wipe down Kaz, who had managed to sit up.  He was still shaking, slight little tremors that ran through his body seemingly at random.

Once they were both more or less clean, Inej dropped the rag, grabbed her underwear, and climbed back onto the bed, pulling it on as she went.

“Do you want me to stay?” she asked, voice soft in the quiet of the room.

“Always,” Kaz replied, a bit of honesty he hadn’t expected to let slip.

Inej laughed.  “I have to go back out eventually,” she reminded him.  “But I’ll come back for as long as you will have me.”

She closed her eyes, curled against Kaz’s side, and, as he watched her, dozed off.

Kaz pressed a careful, secret kiss to the top of her head.  “I love you,” he whispered, then fell asleep himself.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a lesbian I don't know how dicks work


End file.
